BSC #60: Mary Anne’s Makeover (Ch. 13 & 14)

Chapter Thirteen

  • Mary Anne runs after Dawn, who isn’t answering her. The next exchange is so good, it’s hard not to just retype the whole thing, but where’s the fun in that? One thing is certain, assertive Mary Anne is out to throw down:

Dawn was practically at the bottom before she turned around. This look of make-believe shock was on her face. “Are you calling me?”

“I don’t know any other Dawn in the house.”

Whoa. I couldn’t believe I said that.

  • Both of them assumed the other one wasn’t talking to them, which is probably one of the most common reasons why people fight. Mary Anne then accuses Dawn of being jealous, to which Dawn snaps, “Jealous? Me, jealous of you? Dream on, Mary Anne!” She then goes on to accuse Mary Anne of lounging around the house all night admiring her “boy haircut and clown makeup.” OH NO YOU DIDN’T, DAWN!

  • At least Mary Anne has a fierce response to this before she runs into her room to cry hysterically and vow to never speak to Dawn again: “Oh, go choke on an alfalfa sprout.” Mary Anne: 1 Dawn: 0
  • During her crying fit, Mary Anne equates Dawn to a witch. I think that’s the Mary Anne equivalent to the B-word.
  • After her crying fit, Mary Anne decides she needs to try again. She goes to the kitchen where Dawn is standing over a pot of boiling tofu (gross, maybe she really is a witch) and apologizes to her. Sure, because Dawn being a giant witch to her was her fault. Despite the fact that this greatly bothers me, I must accept the fact that Mary Anne is trying to be the bigger person here and let that go. Dawn’s response? “Yeah. Right.”

  • But Mary Anne keeps going instead of giving Dawn the finger and telling her to choke on tofu this time, as I probably would have done.
  • They go up to Mary Anne’s room to talk (while Sharon probably digs through the laundry looking for the tofu fork, or something. That’s probably a thing.). Mary Anne says she didn’t do anything to hurt Dawn, and Dawn brings up the trip to the mall, expressing that she felt left. It really bothered her that Mary Anne didn’t talk to her about getting the haircut when they usually share everything with each other. She goes on to confess how it all got compounded when Mary Anne came back from the trip seeming so close to her dad. Guess you’re not allowed to do anything alone with your dad anymore, Mary Anne. Consequently, if Dawn spends any one on one time with her mom I guess you’re in the right to throw a bitch fit.
  • Mary Anne makes the point that Dawn and the girls were always telling her to be more independent, and then she goes and does it and is treated like a traitor. Welcome to the world of adults, where no one really knows what they want and one thing really means something else. Maybe Dawn should go into politics.
  • Dawn also believed the Carlos rumor. Damn you Carlos! I wonder if this Carlos even exists. I imagine he looks like a soap opera star wearing hammer pants, since it’s 1993.
  • Dawn finally mutters out an apology that doesn’t seem like nearly enough to me, and they smile and laugh, all being right with the world again. Well, almost. At the next BSC meeting, she and the other girls set things straight and they all tell her how good her hair looks. This conversation is unfortunately just briefly recapped and we don’t find out if any other catty remarks were exchanged. Damn you, Peter Lerangis! (Who wrote this one.)

  • Now Mary Anne’s only concern is Carolyn and her fake time machine. She blames herself for letting it get out of hand, which again, is ridiculous. “You could have called one of us,” Stacey says. “Yeah, I know,” Mary Anne replies. Really?! When they were being so mean to you?! You’re killing me, Mary Anne.
  • Kristy is baby-sitting over there tomorrow, because the Arnolds are expecting a big overseas shipment. Mary Anne is baby-sitting for some much younger kids, but she’ll bring them over anyway to help out. Yeah, expose young kids to the basement being torn apart by children upset they paid a dollar for nothing. (That’s pretty much how Claudia is imagining the scene. Maybe her English class has been reading Lord of the Flies.)

Chapter Fourteen

  • The chapter opens with four year old Jenny complaining that she doesn’t want to go to the Arnold’s house if it’s going to be scary. Don’t worry, Jenny. It won’t be scary, but you have to go because Mary Anne feels responsible for a child that is really her parents’ problem. I know you’d rather be home watching Sesame Street. Because you’re four.
  • Carolyn is preparing to put her sister inside the time machine when she gets stage fright…in front of the two baby-sitters, four year old and literal infant that make up her audience. Turns out she doesn’t believe her own time machine will work, but Mary Anne convinces her it’s still fun to pretend it does, just give the kids their money back so we avoid the Lord of the Flies scenario Claudia foretold. Carolyn agrees.
  • After Marilyn’s “trip” back to Paris 1900, she comes back excitedly babbling about all the stuff she “saw”. This makes Jenny want to try. I wonder if she asks to go back to eight o’clock too.





Lauren likes to write, which is why she has this website. She also enjoys genealogy, video games, Broadway musicals, things of the 90's and singing. She lives in New York with her husband and daughter.
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